Sunday, July 25, 2010

Jason Bourne with a vagina? "Salt" dissapoints - C

After being tortured and beaten to a pulp, Evelyn Salt is released from a North Korean prison, thanks to the love of her German national boy-toy, Mike Krause. Flash-forward 2 years, and she's back at work in the C.I.A. interrogating a supposed defector of the Russian spy network. And (you've seen the trailer), he reveals that Evelyn is a *surprise* Russian spy! Oh no! What will she do?

She makes a run for it, of course!

Salt goes rogue: fashioning a bazooka out of some chemicals and a fire extinguisher, jumping onto moving semis on the freeway, making her way through underground tunnels and the like.

Once she succeeds in killing the Russian president in an attempt to frame America for a dastardly deed, she makes her way to a barge on the river to meet up with her fellow comrades. As children, they bonded in the super-spy training program, and Salt is welcomed with open arms...

That is, until she decides to kill those who ruined her life and forced her to become a spy. Sound familiar? Didn't Jason Bourne do the same thing? The only people Salt and Bourne trust are their naive partners, who, sadly, end up dead by the time the credits roll. Don't get involved with undercover spies, people!

*Sigh* My hero was sexy and badass, as she always is (love ya, Angie!). But I've seen this movie a dozen times before, and that 'twist' at the end came as no surprise to me. Why else would Liev Shrieber sign up to do this thing, unless his seemingly small role turned into a bigger one in the end? What a waste of Sabertooth.

You can afford not to see it in theaters. Put it in your Netflix queue or wait about 8 months till it comes out for rent.

No comments:

Post a Comment

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...